Yesterday was also the first day for the full schola cantorum to sing together and I say it went well. Not super to the discerning ear with perfect pitch but grand non the less. I love chant and what can I say, the love of Latin is growing. Now to juggle scholar and catechism classes in between learning Veni Sancte Spritus.
Yesterday was also another confirmation of what I’ve been trying to get a grip on for a while now. Discerning God’s will for my life and my unique purpose. Over time though I have begun to worry about it less and just letting go. I have been focusing more on trying to allow God to use me as He wills in my current situation…and i think i’m somewhat succeeding, my problem is I am one of those dramatic people who like stuff to be larger than life, so I want to be given a larger than life purpose too. But I’m leaving that more and focusing moe on living the ordinary in a holy way.
In order to discern God’s will easier though I believe I need a spiritual director and so I will be proactively seeking one. Another thing ‘Tash said struck me, to wake up everyday and say Come Holy Spirit fill my life today; an OK what’s next God approach methinks. To let the Holy Spirit fan into flame my gifts, and to use it for the greater glory of God and the ministry of the church. And how scary that can be. Yet i’m not scared I’m just not there yet. I’m thinking I need to be there before my purpose is revealed, yet how do I get there; mmm hence the need of a spiritual director. I have a someone in mind. Whom I’m a bit apprehensive to approach. Why is life so fraught with useless worries?